Ways of attracting tourists: the power of sex in tourist attraction

Ways of attracting tourists: the power of sex in tourist attraction

Much spirited effort has been applied to sex up our tourism industry in the past. In spite of the endeavor, so many tourists choose to spend their Euros and Dollars elsewhere. Conventional tourism is losing out fast without our knowledge. We have to play catch up and soon before our hotels complete the rotting cycle.

After in-depth research, I have found out the missing link and how we can bridge the gap without spending too much resources. It involves curving out an attraction niche that will guarantee an edge over our competitors. We simply have to complement our natural tourist attraction potential with a touch of romance.

The routine is to blend white beaches at the coast with white thighs and flavor our wild animals’ attraction with gyrating wild sex. We have to complement our sunny weather with sumptuous beauties. Sun, sand and sex safari packages should be our tourism mantra. What we have always missed in the equation is the fact that sex make the world to move.

Our bitches are too ready and too willing to play peek-a-boo; every girl I meet is dreaming of a white boyfriend, sugar daddy, husband or a white fling? Why, the power of the greenback! The sight of a dollar loosens panties and makes every woman with a brain go wet. Their problem has always been how to net the elusive white dicks.

Legions of our chicks are in sites such as Tagged, Afrointroductions and Plentyoffish.com. All dreaming of digging out a white gold. You should see their pics on these sites! Boobs, asses, thighs are exposed to advantage. Pity em sweet gals! Desperados are burning money on adverts in Lonely Hearts with the all too common refrain…sweet, sexy, caring Kenyan gal looking for Caucasian man…

C’mon guys! There are no lonely hearts in Kenya, there are only lonely pockets waiting for Caucasian money. It is unfortunate that we have an insensitive and an unthinking government, otherwise, it would have noticed this and build a multimillion sex industry. Humdrum methods are doing us no good, agencies and even adverts on CNN are yet to bring meaningful gains. Sheer waste of dosh.


Have our tourist marketing gurus ever visited Thailand and Rio? What is the secret behind the millions of tourists that swipe credit cards in their hotels and hurry to nowhere in their beaches? The answer is no more than a three letter word: SEX!

A local example is in order. Ever been to Malindi? This Italian town thrives on pussie. I didn’t see a single broke gal in that town. Our wily Shiros hooked the Italians to pussie. The pussie-fuddled Italians threw their return ticket to the blue sea. Word of fairy tale cunts went back to Italy and every dying Italian punter trooped into Malindi and built a villa, married Shiro and before long, Euros started flowing to Kabete by the Millions. Don’t forget that the will has been drawn and safely tucked in Shiro’s bra. Business is booming!

Imagine if we were to replicate this in other towns along the coast. Have Akinyis hook Arabs and make Mombasa the New Dubai. Millions of oil money will be remitted to Kisumu to build skyscrapers. Fatumas to offer a buffet of fresh cunt to Germans and make the south coast another Dusseldorf and watch how poverty in Kwale will be a long forgotten historical phenomenon. And so forth.

How do we get there? Our Ministry of Tourism should embrace the following:

1. Build low cost hostels for gals at the coast where they can ply their trade

2. Legalize prostitution

3. Facilitate a feature of Kenyan pussie delicacy in Playboy magazine

4. Offer soft loans to gals who want to venture into the pussie trade- for buying lingerie, panties, perfumes and etc

5. Start sex co-operative societies along the coast so that gals can save up their proceeds.

6. Offer free courses in Italian, Spanish, German and French at an institute to be set up specifically for this purpose. Our gals will be able to communicate effectively with the tourists.

7. Offer free sex coaching by government sexologists to impart better sex techniques

8. Attract pornographic producers to shoot videos at our coast featuring Kenyan gals and distribute them worldwide

9. Set up annual sex expo and jamboree to show case our sexual prowess as a nation

10. Set up annual miss sex tourism pageant

11. Commence a reward scheme for chicks who manage to winkle the most money out of tourists

12. Close Mama Ngina drive to the public and make it an exclusive sex picnic

13. Erect bill boards in major tourist source markets featuring Kenyan gals

14. Request Tiger Woods, Bill Clinton and Silvio Berlusconi to endorse our prostitutes

15. Have one public day that honors and celebrates sex trade

16. Have a minister of sex tourism and appoint one nominated MP who is an active pussie trader

17. Have a sex traders and allied workers union

18. Erect a statue of a nude sex worker in Parliament to replace that of Jomo Kenyatta

19. Make postcards and stamps of skimpy and voluptuous Kenyan gals

20. Name a street in Nairobi after sex say Kuma Street and the likes


If we adopt the above tourist attraction measures, our economy will grow in leaps and bounds! Thailand will pale in comparison and Rio will be reduced to a market place experience!